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The rise of the great chin empire Part 2 – “The 100” 1×01 Photo Recap

This is Part two of this recap. Part one can be found HERE and should be read first or you won’t understand any of the super clever and intelligent, not at all obvious jokes.

We return to episode one with Team Clarke going on a journey through the woods to try to find food for everyone else on the mountain that they were wrongfully dropped next to instead of on top of. Everyone’s having a great time eating flowers and teaching Jasper how to flirt, except for Clarke who is power walking through the trees fast enough to make paths for everyone else to follow with nothing but the power of her stride and incredible leadership qualities.

Despite everyone else having fun and not paying much attention, Clarke reminds them that they have been on a radiation soaked planet for about an hour and are probably close to death so they should take themselves more seriously. She also points out that there are no animals around which would be promising if not for the fact that they were probably all killed by the radiation soaked leaves that the others were basically just making a scarecrow with.

They walk about another two steps and see a deer, just popping in to let Clarke know that she’s wrong at the perfect moment, because radiation had made the animals smarter and given them a taste for irony. As it turns out, this isn’t your average deer and everyone involved is startled about how unexpected everything is.

Finn is pretty offended that not only did his chin not come with a head like Clarke’s did, but they got two, so they decide to keep moving and leave the deer where they are.

On the Ark, Abby is preforming surgery on Jaha and once again we can’t make any jokes because there is nothing funny about the possible death of the Captain leader president. However, Shumway drops by to let Kane know that they found the person responsible for creating this seriousness wrinkle in our jokeable content and it’s none other than Bellamy Blake. We’re shocked to learn this, especially given how full of fun, games, and smiles group dad Bellamy has been thus far.

Wells is helping gather some sticks so he can build a lincoln logs house while everyone else is busy screwing around, but it turns out that Murphy has some other ideas for a good time on earth

He probably should have stuck with a different message or just left his number or a small heart with his initials because Wells isn’t impressed by this one. Murphy is disappointed but may be in luck because Bellamy happened to have heard that there’s a salon opening up and he’s really enthusiastic about hair product.

Unfortunately, John and John’s Salon doesn’t carry any gel which is pretty disappointing so instead Bellamy comes up with a new idea that they should make everyone on the Ark think they’re dead for funsies. John and John are pretty cool with that plan so they all take off to do that instead.

Clarke and the gang are strolling through the woods trying to forget about the insulting deer party hosts, so she tells them all about why they’re on earth. She carefully explains that her father thought the people should be warned about the Ark failing, and then Finn comes up with yet another really great idea.

Clarke is rendered speechless because not only is that exactly what she just said, but it is at least a sure sign that Finn’s ideas are getting better and he is beginning to retain important information and may have a head attached after all.

Speaking of great ideas, when they turn around, Octavia is throwing her clothes off and jumping into the water that she doesn’t know the depth of and can’t swim in. Thankfully, it’s shallow enough that she can stand which makes swimming safer despite the likely painful dive. But that isn’t the biggest problem, because there’s an incredible hulking eel/snake/alien charging straight at her. They warn her to get out but Octavia challenges the eel/snake/alien to a staring contest. It’s underwater so it knows it stands no chance and thus charges at her and bites her instead.

A great rescue sequence ensues complete with dramatic lighting,

jaw dropping close ups,

and Clarke being the most intelligent yet again. However this time around it isn’t only Clarke’s awesome working brain that saves the day. Jasper jumps in the water and pulls out Octavia just in time so they don’t get attacked by the angry sea creature again and all is well. Not much good comes of the situation, but Jasper at least gets a hands on demonstration of the picking up girls lesson everyone was giving him earlier.

Back at camp, while waiting for the others to return, Bellamy and Wells decide to challenge one another to a rap battle, because Wells is upset about everyone taking off their bracelets. Bellamy’s “Whatever the hell we want” rap goes over way better than Wells’s “I came here for the bracelet.” Wells is pretty angry by it but we all know Bellamy deserved the title due to his incredible lyrical abilities.

Because Abby used too much blood and supplies to make sure Jaha wasn’t dead, she’s now on Kane’s naughty list. He arrests her and sentences her to be executed which again is not funny save for the image of Kane as Santa. And this is the north pole where we can make jokes about giant eel snakes and kids who try to fly and die but we will not make jokes about how enthusiastic Kane is to have Abby killed.

In the middle of the night, Clarke and Finn wake up and hang out for a while. Finn shows her the footprint that he found. It suggests that the person walking was standing on two feet and he guesses it’s a monkey. Clarke is appalled that in the middle of their current realistic setting, and glowing blue plants Finn would suggest something as ludicrous as a monkey in the forest. Meanwhile, due to the consequences of their rap battle, Bellamy gets his friends to beat up Wells and steal his bracelet, ending is potential for a relationship with cadet Romeo that he had been hoping for.

Abby’s pre-execution event is going down and it’s no fun for anyone since this is the part we aren’t allowed to joke about and everyone has to be very serious.

But Jaha hears about it and finds out that everyone is being serious because he might die and he isn’t even dead, so he comes to set things right.

Jaha stops the execution, rescues Abby and fixes everything by the power of is intense gaze and chin alone, and everyone is eternally grateful.

The kids that are out looking for Mount Weather are awake again and have to cross the river with the man eating eel in it in order to get there so they’ve decided to try using a little vine swing instead of swimming this time around. At first Finn is going to do it but instead Jasper volunteers since Finn already has the chin going for him and this is his one chance to prove that he’s still worthy despite his lack of cool facial DNA.

He gets across and everyone is really excited and happy, complete with optimistic music playing and more smiles than the entire series will see from this point forward just before he is speared through the abdomen by an unseen creature.

This is such a shocking and terrifying thing to happen in the middle of our happy music and smiles, that Clarke realizes she has made the first bad choice of the series.


The rise of the great chin empire – “The 100” 1×01 rewatch Recap

We start the pilot episode of The 100 on the Ark, in solitary with Clarke doing her doodles on the cell floor and inner monologuing about feelings she’s never experienced and earth vs. space, remembering a time when you could still tell her hair was blonde. She’s drawing a pretty impressive picture and some guards come in to stop it because this is the Ark and fun is not allowed here. Clarke goes to the back of her cell looking rather panicked to let the guys know she drew them some other pictures that they were supposed to love.

In return, the guard offers her a bracelet but neither of them are very cool about each other’s gifts. When he sees she’s wearing someone else’s watch, a fight ensues. Clarke has learned some moves from that scorpion she drew.

She makes a run out of prison and in the hallway runs into her mother. Abby tells Clarke that she gets to go to earth instead of being a prisoner and then quickly puts her to sleep before Clarke can remind her exactly how unsafe that could be.

We wake up in the spaceship with Clarke who is pretty confused about the guard still giving her a bracelet despite his obvious distaste for her drawings.


Wells tells Clarke he got himself arrested on purpose to let her know that she isn’t the only one that got a present from cadet Romeo. She thinks that’s just about the stupidest idea she’s ever heard but he’s pretty enthusiastic looking about it despite their impending deaths.

Wells’s dad comes up on the telly to let everyone know that the real reason they’re all there is because the strong bold power that his impressive, glorious cleft chin gives him enables him to send them earth. But the good news is, he’s packed their ship with so many other cleft chins, that they are destined to survive based on strength and good looks alone.

Clarke is still pretty angry at Wells because he has a bracelet too so she’s not entirely impressed by the faith his dad has in her chin.

Then Finn comes floating on over which is the safest possible thing anyone could be doing on a quickly dropping, hundred year old space ship crashing through the earth’s atmosphere.

Stupid is apparently contagious in space in the future so a few other kids try to get out of their seats as well and fly around with Finn just as the ship is starting to get all on fire.

Back on the Ark, they’re coming to the realization that the ship is crashing and in flames and that this was all probably not the best idea they’ve ever had.

And Wells is really upset that he rubbed that bracelet situation in Clarke’s face because now there’s a very high chance they’re going to die, and he truthfully just wanted to make her jealous that she didn’t draw him a picture instead.

The ship lands and everyone quickly gets out of their seats. Everyone except for the two guys on the floor that tried to follow Finn out of their seats and got themselves dead.

Despite the dead guys, everyone is really excited to open the door and rush out of the drop ship onto the possibly radiation soaked planet, so Clarke doesn’t have much time to deal with the dead kids before she has to run to deal with the soon to be dead kids and the shocking revelation that she’s somehow just become the parent of 99 other teens.

Thankfully though, they have a dad too and he also has the right chin for the job, so Clarke isn’t alone in her parenting endeavors while Bellamy is herding everyone away from the door.

A girl who is apparently very happy to see Bellamy emerges from the back of the ship and they hug it out for a while despite her being appalled about his choice in outfit. We learn through some strange shouting from the crowd that this girl’s name is Octavia Blake, Bellamy’s sister, that lived under the floor, also has the right chin, and is weird because she has a brother. Octavia is pretty offended by all of their incredibly unfair and off base assumptions.

After stopping her from attacking all of them for being so incredibly wrong about her, Bellamy suggests she be the first person to step out into the possible radiation so that they’ll have a better fun fact for the next party. Octavia loves the idea of being a possible sacrifice so she steps outside first.

Fortunately, she does not blow up and that is a sure enough sign for everyone else that everything is great and fine so they run outside after her really happily.

While everyone else is having a montage to Radioactive by Imagine Dragons, Clarke has no time for fun and goes to check out her map of their landing site. She quickly sees that there is only one mountain around and it is directly across from them so basically they’re all screwed. Finn comes over to make some sassy remarks since he’s not sad about the dead kids anymore. But Clarke isn’t here for fun. So instead Finn asks her if she likes being called princess but doesn’t get a good response since Clarke is still angry at him and has serious, important things to discuss like food and the amateur landing skills of their ship.

Later, Wells stops by to point out to Clarke that most of their communication isn’t working. Jasper comes by too to make some jokes but Wells doesn’t like joks so he yells at Jasper who is quickly defended by a pack of more kids. All the ruckus wakes up dad, who is upset that being on the ground isn’t good enough for the kids. Bellamy and Octavia are upset that Clarke and Wells want to be the bosses and think getting food is a good idea, when everyone knows that Wells can’t be a leader because he has his mother’s DNA.

Clarke is a pretty big advocate for chin equality so she stands in front of the unblessed and defends Wells’s honor, complete with swelling inspirational background music and motivating and intense speech eyes.

After some more conflict, Clarke realizes that Finn appears to have messed with his wrist band. He says he was trying to get it off and Clarke doesn’t understand why anyone would possibly want to take of the wrist band that connects them to the people they’re trying to safe. Finn doesn’t get what the big deal is and Clarke has to remind him that there are people he cares about up in the sky that will think he’s dead.

With that out of the way, Clarke, Wells, Finn, and the two other guys Wells was mad at before decide to go on an expedition to find the food. Octavia changed her mind about not being cool with all of their lack of appropriate qualifications and decides to come along because she’s super turned on by all of Finn’s really good ideas.

Back on the Ark, Abby is watching Clarke’s face on the wall of delinquents to make sure she stays okay but while she’s doing that, someone gives her a call and she goes rushing out. As it turns out, someone shot Jaha, and well I won’t make any jokes about this one because there is nothing funny about the possible death of the President Leader of Regal Chins at a time such as this.

Stay posted for Part 2 tomorrow! I’m keeping these in two parts so we have more to stay busy with during the rewatch!